Adverse Childhood Experiences

A note from Joanna

Joe, a 57-year-old construction worker, had never missed a day on the job until a few months ago when he was diagnosed with lung cancer. Between the chemotherapy treatments and countless doctor’s appointments, Joe has found himself physically exhausted, emotionally depleted and unable to return to work. Joe has always prided himself for being tough and unflappable, but now he can hardly get through the day without shedding at least a few tears. He often chides himself for being weak, and can’t understand why he isn’t able to get through this like a real man.

Shortly after her husband of five years unexpectedly left her, 28-year-old Susie began having severe panic episodes. She worries about finances, whether she will ever have children, and cannot stop thinking about what she did to cause the demise of her marriage. Susie forces herself to go to work, but it takes everything out of her. She comes home exhausted and spends her evenings and weekends on the couch, binge-watching crime shows, drinking wine and eating junk food until 8pm when she finally allows herself to return to the comfort of her bed.

After working 45 years in the same school cafeteria, 68-year-old Doris recently retired and now spends her days smoking cigarettes on her back porch. Doris never had much to say to her co-workers and she chose not to marry or have children, so Doris is mostly alone. If you asked her, she would say she’s perfectly happy with her life, but inside, Doris feels isolated, hopeless and alone. She regularly tells herself that she is a failure. Lately Doris has developed a severe cough, and finds herself hoping it is something fatal so she can just be done with this miserable life.

Aside from the depression and anxiety symptoms, on the surface these three (fictional) individuals don’t seem to have a lot of similarities. But while they differ in age, circumstances and ways of coping with their circumstances, they do share one very specific thing in common.

Joe, Susie and Doris all experienced chronic childhood trauma.

***

Joe’s dad went to prison when Joe was 12. His mother worked long hours, and Joe was responsible for his two younger siblings after school. He helped with homework, bathed them and prepared dinner — his specialty was hot dogs and boxed macaroni and cheese. Joe didn’t have much time for his own activities, but his mother always thanked him and told him how much she appreciated him being “the man of the house.” Throughout his adolescence, Joe tried hard not to feel sorry for himself or compare himself to his much more carefree friends.

***

Throughout elementary school, Susie was bullied by two girls in her class who determined her to be “the weird smart girl.” She had a few friends, but the bullying took a major toll on her self-esteem. She always felt invisible, so when an incredibly handsome classmate asked her to homecoming her junior year, Susie was shocked. They began dating exclusively, but Susie still could not believe he chose her. She relished in the popularity she experienced as his girlfriend. When they got married a few years later, Susie felt like she had won the lottery.

***

Doris was an only child who grew up in a poor, working class neighborhood. Although her father worked very hard in a local factory, Doris’ mother spent her days at the casino, gambling and drinking. This was never discussed — her father hardly talked about much of anything, and when Doris’ mother was home, she was usually passed out on the couch. Doris had one close friend throughout her childhood, but they drifted apart in high school. Doris told herself she was a loner and didn’t need people. She started working at age 16 and prided herself in being a hard worker her bosses could always depend on.

***

So what does trauma have to do with it?

The ACE Study

In the mid-90’s, researchers from Kaiser Permanente and the CDC set out to see if negative childhood events such as household dysfunction or experiencing abuse or neglect correlated with physical and mental health problems later in life. Over several years, 17,000 individuals in the Kaiser Permanente health system were given questionnaires related to their childhood experiences and the state of their physical and mental health as adults.

Participants were asked whether they had experienced physical, sexual or emotional abuse, physical or emotional neglect, witnessed domestic violence, whether there was substance abuse or mental illness in the household, or whether parents/caregivers were divorced or incarcerated.

Surprisingly, more than half the individuals surveyed reported experiencing at least one of the events in question. The results of this massive study (one of the largest of its kind), led to the development of the Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Questionnaire, one that is now commonly used to gain richer insight into an individual’s physical, social and emotional development.

Among many other findings, this study discovered that individuals who experienced 4 or more ACE factors in childhood had a significantly increased risk for myriad health problems including substance abuse, cancer, suicidal behavior, obesity, smoking, heart disease and depression.

Reasons are complicated, but the National Scientific Council on the Developing Child (Harvard University) theorizes that the “toxic stress” (chronic abuse, neglect or other stressful life events) caused by these adverse childhood experiences has a biological impact on a person’s ability to develop in an emotionally and physically healthy way.

This profoundly influences a person’s view of themselves, others and the world, the development of their emotion regulation system, their immune system, behaviors and lifestyle choices as well as their interpersonal relationships.

Why Does it Matter?

I give the ACE Questionnaire to just about everyone I work with, and those with high scores often shrug their shoulders. “So what,” they say. “I knew this. I’m fine. My hardships made me who I am.”

And while that’s partially true, many people who experienced chronic childhood trauma are extremely good at denying it, minimizing its impact or stuffing down any emotions they have about it. Thus, they often have poor insight as to how their experiences could be impacting their lives today.

My clients with childhood trauma often point out to me that they did not come to therapy to talk about their childhoods. They just want help for their anxiety, depression or relationship troubles. Plus, they tell me, they don’t have the time or the energy to dig up the past. It’s painful — why would they willingly do that to themselves?

Slowly I have to warm them to the idea that it does matter.

“We repeat what we don’t repair.”

This quote, most often attributed to Christine Langley-Obaugh, highlights the importance of slugging through the painful process of dealing with our pasts.

Whether we recognize it or not, unresolved negative childhood experiences are likely to pop up in just about every area of our lives. They impact our moods (irritable, defensive), behaviors (numbing, risky, addictive) and relationships (chaotic, unsatisfying, abusive). Our health, jobs and relationships are affected as the negative patterns established in childhood tend to repeat themselves in multiple ways over and over again.

(And don’t be deceived — even if you personally have a low ACE score, you are likely impacted.  For example, the cost of trauma to tax-payers is estimated to be $458 billion dollars a year.)

It’s Complicated

Trauma is an incredibly complicated and draining personal, social and cultural issue, and there’s a lot to unpack.

For example, not everyone with adverse childhood experience is impacted in an overly negative way. In 2006, researchers in Maine developed a Resilience Questionnaire which highlights those factors that can help protect individuals against the negative impact of trauma.

Additionally, there are many treatments and interventions today that can help individuals heal from the past.

Aside from traditional talk therapy, interventions like EMDR, prolonged exposure therapy and specific types of cognitive behavior therapy can help individuals build tolerance to being exposed to traumatic memories, help them challenge and change negative beliefs about themselves and the world, and introduce them to new ways of coping with and accepting the difficult things that have happened to them.

For fictional people like Joe, Susie and Doris, and the millions of real individuals who suffer the effects of real trauma, there is hope. Stay tuned as we continue to talk about this important topic.

If you are in the Greenwood/Indianapolis, Indiana area and are interested in learning more about DBT, give us a call at 317-743-8202 or email [email protected]. Even if you’re not in the area and have questions, we would be glad to help if we can.

References

1. acesaware.org; https://www.acesaware.org/wp-content/uploads/2022/07/ACE-Questionnaire-for-Adults-Identified-English-rev.7.26.22.pdf

2. https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/aces/index.html

3. https://developingchild.harvard.edu/

4. https://scchildren.org/wp-content/uploads/ACE-Research-Brief-2-Lessons-Learned-and-Future-Directions.pdf

5. https://www.wfmz.com/features/life-lessons/toxic-stress-from-early-childhood-adversity/article_bb70413a-80dc-11ea-8bd2-ffa21358a990.html

6. https://developingchild.harvard.edu/science/key-concepts/toxic-stress/

7. https://www.lanereport.com/157973/2022/07/op-ed-economic-costs-of-trauma-greater-than-you-think/#:~:text=Estimates%20vary%20on%20the%20total,estimated%20at%20%24458%20billion%20annually.

8. https://cls.unc.edu/wp-content/uploads/sites/3019/2016/08/From-ACESTOOHIGH-ACES-and-Resilience-questions.pdf

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder: Part 2

As debilitating as OCD can be, there is hope for individuals who seek help. This usually includes a combination of medication and therapy.

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder: Part 1

A note from Joanna

You are driving to work, and an ad for a smoke detector comes on the radio. “Oh no,” you think, “did I remember to turn off the stove after I made my scrambled egg this morning?”

You stop for gas, and before grabbing the pump, a thought suddenly pops into your head: “I wonder how often someone wipes this thing down?”

Later, you are sitting in a meeting and have the urge to get up and yell obscenities at your boss.

These are examples of intrusive thoughts. Everyone has them at least occasionally, and if we’re honest, some of our intrusive thoughts can be pretty outrageous.

For most of us, these “throwaway” thoughts float by like a leaf on a river. Our brain either knows how to discard them (we don’t actually intend to get up and yell at the boss), or how to cope with them (we mentally rehearse our morning and remember that we did, in fact, turn off the stove, or we have hand sanitizer in the car to cope with the dirty things we sometimes have to touch).

This is life – we are forgetful, we have to touch dirty things, and sometimes our brains play tricks on us.

Most of us are pretty comfortable with these realities.

But for the approximately 2.5 million Americans who suffer from Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, or OCD, these ordinary bumps in the road become debilitating roadblocks.

When a person has OCD, they often develop compulsions — repetitive and forced behaviors — as a way to cope with intrusive and disturbing thoughts. Their brains will just not let go of troublesome thoughts, so it must create elaborate routines, rituals and behaviors in an effort to relieve the anxiety they cause.

The fear of not turning off the stove forces a person to compulsively turn back and double check, sometimes two or three times, causing them to be late for work or exasperate their passengers.

The concern about the dirty handle involves finding a way to either avoid putting gas in the car (great if there’s someone available to help, but totally inconvenient to always depend on another person), or wearing gloves every time there’s a need to fill up.

As for the urge to cry out at a meeting — a person with OCD may chide themselves for being disrespectful and wonder how on earth they could be such a terrible person. In response, they might develop a behavior such as an elaborate ritual for leaving work that they believe will help them keep from blurting out unwanted things.

These are fairly mild examples — often, obsessive thoughts are often extremely disturbing or disruptive, and compulsions can be time-consuming and embarrassing. (I have worked with more than a few clients who have been quite traumatized by the content of their intrusive thoughts or completely debilitated by their compulsions.)

OCD is Misunderstood & it’s Not Just Anxiety

More than likely you have heard of OCD — you’ve seen it portrayed in movies and television (As Good as it Gets, Monk) or have heard of a celebrity who suffers from it (Howie Mandel is one).

But even though OCD is a familiar term to many, it is often greatly misunderstood. For example, I have heard people say they wish they had OCD so they could be more organized or orderly.

People also tend to think of OCD as only excessive or repetitive behavior, such as hand washing or obsessive counting.

While some people who have OCD are obsessed with orderliness or cleanliness, and compulsions can include excessive hand-washing or counting, it is far more than this.

Often, their fears are related to something very unlikely or not consistent with their behavior. For example, a mother might be worried she hurt her children even though there is no evidence and no one else is concerned about this. Someone might fear they will contract a rare tropical disease even though they have never traveled to the country or come into contact with anyone who has.

And while many individuals with OCD experience sometimes debilitating anxiety, the presentation is atypical, and OCD is not technically considered an anxiety disorder. In the DSM-V (2013) it was given its own category: Obsessive-Compulsive and Related Conditions. This includes OCD as well as other conditions like body dysmorphic disorder, hoarding disorder, and trichotillomania (hair-pulling).

In order to find appropriate treatments, it is important to distinguish “typical” anxiety symptoms from the anxiety associated with OCD. The medications and therapies used to treat OCD are related but somewhat different than what is used in anxiety conditions. Additionally, an accurate diagnosis can prevent unnecessary treatments, such as inpatient hospitalization.

I once worked with a young woman who had obsessive/intrusive thoughts of suicide. This is obviously very serious and was alarming to the person and her parents. However, after our initial evaluation, it was clear to me she suffered from OCD, not actual suicidal ideation.

She was adamant that she didn’t want to die, had no intent to take her life, and was in fact worried that she might accidentally do something to cause her own death.

If she had been misdiagnosed as being at risk for suicide, she could have been wrongly hospitalized which can cause a trauma all its own.

Fortunately my client was not hospitalized, and I was able to provide a referral for medication. She was greatly relieved to hear that her brain was “just playing tricks on her.” We created a plan for how to cope more effectively with these intrusive thoughts, and with the combination of medication and cognitive behavioral strategies, these disturbing thoughts eventually subsided.

While many people who suffer from OCD feel hopeless at times, there are effective treatments. In my next post, I’ll talk a bit more about these, as well as provide resources for more information.

If you are in the Greenwood/Indianapolis, Indiana area and are interested in learning more about how the therapy process works, give us a call at 317-743-8202 or email [email protected]. Even if you’re not in the area and have questions, we would be glad to help if we can.

Hope for Borderline Personality Disorder

Experiencing constant emotional storms is a reality of life for the millions of individuals who suffer from the symptoms associated with Borderline Personality Disorder (or BPD).

BPD is a debilitating condition that is typically diagnosed in young adulthood and is characterized by emotional instability, chaos in relationships, a sense of emptiness or or lack of identity, and difficulty communicating feelings and needs appropriately. Many individuals with BPD struggle with ongoing thoughts of suicide; they often self-injure or engage in destructive and impulsive behaviors.

Creating a Depression-Fighting Plan

While many of us think of depression as sadness, that doesn’t even begin to describe it. Although sadness can be a component of depression, individuals with major depressive disorder frequently experience a sense of emptiness and meaninglessness and often profound feelings of helplessness, hopelessness or worthlessness.

How to React to Life Stressors More Effectively

In July 2020, Kyle Burgess was taking a run on a mountain trail in Utah when he stumbled upon some adorable baby animals. Knowing his family would enjoy a video, he pulled out his phone and started recording. At first he thought the animals were bobcats, but when their mother appeared on the path to chase him away, he quickly realized they were cougars. Amazingly, Kyle maintained his cool and kept filming while the mother pursued him for a terrifying near-six minutes…

A Three Step Strategy for Managing Anxiety

Morning after morning I woke up with a hard-to-describe feeling that started deep in my abdomen and swelled through my chest. I would lay in bed, miserably waiting for this unwelcome and never-tardy intruder to show up and temporarily paralyze me with a mixture of fear, dread, and self-recrimination.

Creating Positive Emotional Experiences

Allowing yourself to experience positive emotions — even temporarily — can give your mind and body a much-needed break from feeling sadness, fear or anxiety. Research done by Barbara Fredrickson has shown that positive emotions can help us think more flexibly and become more resilient.

Therapist Green Flags

I’m never afraid to tell my clients that I have been in therapy. Being in therapy with the right person at the right time changed my life.

Someone You Can Talk To

Assuming your therapist possesses at least a basic level of training and competency in their chosen field, it turns out that “being someone you can talk to” is essentially one of the most important factors of all in finding the right therapist.